Betty's Turn-Down Game

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Story ID	Title	Creator	Status	Num Entries	Date Finished
174	Springtime in Virginia	betty	Done	22	12/27/2022
When they bloom they will look as if they are marching, and when the neighbors see them, they will exclaim, " and I'll say, "Well, there's the Spam, egg, sausage, and Spam... that's not got much Spam in it."
173	Daylight Saving Time !	betty	Done	23	4/21/2021
There was a collective exhale and then an immediate inhale, because the last thing we wanted was a fainting crowd! But there truly was a big sigh of relief followed by the idea of shoring up the outer wall with bits of furniture and old crates.
172	A Winter Day in the Wilderness	bonnie	Done	22	2/15/2021
I couldn't feel my feet or hands anymore. I was so tired. If I could just sleep for a minute or two, I could probably get enough strength to make it to the road.
171	Oh, the weather outside is frightful...	betty	Done	22	12/31/2020
We apprehensively and slowly pulled back a drape and saw to our wonderment and dismay a large thunderstorm right in our path!
170	The McAvoys' Big Turkey Dinner!	betty	Done	23	1/13/2020
I mean brine roast the turkey...too LONG !! We would have to go the tried and true route which was to pack it full of apples and hope for the best. While waiting for the turkey to finished roasting, the oven twiddled its thumbs, wishing it had remembered to charge its phone.
169	A Breath of Fresh Air	bonnie	Done	22	11/15/2019
motion across his neck. Unfortunately, he didn't understand that you're supposed to take a deep breath first. So when he tried to gather up the magnolia leaves, the tree started rustling,he looked up and an avalanche of leaves came tumbling down! He couldn't see!
168	Toiling at 3 a.m.	betty	Done	22	10/13/2019
And? And? sometimes I want to hug somebody. We steeled our resolve and And? And? And? sometimes I want to hug somebody.
167	The Reckoning of the Kiwis	xander	Done	22	7/28/2019
The best thing to do was pass out spoons and tell everyone to get to their battle stations. This was it, the invasion had begun. Fresh-faced cadets leapt into gun emplacements and cockpits, scarcely believing they were actually going to see combat.
166	Somebody's Gotta Do It !	betty	Done	22	7/8/2019
So to calm them down I decided to show them my appointment book with times, dates, and detailed descriptions to verify that yes, indeed, they were enjoying themselves, having kitty treats and drinking warm milk. What a vacation they both were having and all thanks to me and my organizational skills!
165	I love Thunderstorms !	betty	Done	21	6/10/2019
A bit of a lunkhead friend, though, considering when I asked him to give us an autograph, he grabbed the nearest thing to do it on. And now you know why this IHOP menu is framed and hanging on the wall.
164	Wrapping those Christmas Presents !	betty	Done	23	1/9/2019
For the most part he was everything I'd expected and hoped: rosy cheeks, big exuberant belly laughs, and a warm and compassionate spirit, but what most people don't know is that he is an undercover agent with MI-6!
163	Let's Set Fire to the Woods	xander	Done	21	12/7/2018
Can't have a fire without matches. For good measure he also grabbed a can of whoopass should do the tric' Nevertheless, let us with all due diligence seek to find a pool of water or a stream or something to put the fire out!
162	Some Kind of Adventure	xander	Done	23	9/10/2018
Searching for a good spot to lasso the lead line, we spotted what appeared to be a very sturdy Viking axes protruding out of this rocky hillside. They were not even rusty! We tried and tried to pull them out, but we had woven that basket so tightly, they were firmly stuck.
161	That Garage !	betty	Done	22	8/9/2018
All those bank statements, etc., you don't want people to know your every little insecurity!" Well, when somebody puts it like that, it makes perfect sense.
160	I need a Summer Job ! What should it be ?	betty	Done	24	8/3/2018
All the customers will surely think I am a real man because I could handle sweeping the parking lot in the midday sun! My next challenge is to quit messing around and get a REAL job, like you know, I want a big salary, and no sweaty job.
159	A large, healthy tuft of stump grass	bonnie	Done	22	7/18/2018
Granted, the stuff makes you hallucinate, but it tastes like liquid gold. I couldn't imagine walking one more mile without at least a gallon of the stuff on hand, so I started scrounging around for old rags to wipe up the spilled lemonade and the big pool of melted popsicles.
158	Cleaning up after Milo the Mouse	betty	Done	21	7/11/2018
Milo must be nearby! Maybe he is resting in a soft bowl of potpourri to freshen the air. Now all that's required to make everything perfect is celebrate good times, come on! Let's all celebrate and have a good time! A clean, clear smell of fresh mouse urine....ahhhh!
157	Taking a Walking Tour of the UTSA Campus	betty	Done	22	7/6/2017
If you need ANYthing, just ask me, and I will refer you to my friend: Chuck Norris."
156	San Antonio Vacation	greg	Done	22	5/27/2017
"That's yankee territory! I don't want no yankee syrup. I may as well have this with a side of socialism and a hot mug of Bernie Sanders Uber Alles. Give me a bottle of Mrs. of A!" She then pounded the table for emphasis, causing all the stray animals to congregate in Bonnie's back yard.
155	Will That Snow Ever Melt? !	betty	Done	21	2/5/2017
Surely someone would figure out that what I really wanted was a simple joy. And isn't that part of the fabric of life?
154	Different Pizza Toppings	greg	Done	21	1/11/2017
Saturday Night Fever"--it makes you want to dance, but you wouldn't admit to your high-society friends that you like it.
153	But I don't want to!	bonnie	Done	20	11/13/2016
You don't want to get stuck with too much time on our hands, we decided just to go shopping. First we went to Cosco and loaded up on lots of wood glue, posterboard, hammers, and nuclear material.
152	We Need More Enthusiasm !	betty	Done	22	10/16/2016
The matching outfits looked kind of amateur, but the makeup and wigs more than made up for it with Cherry Blossom Bubble Bath! Oh the bubbles.
151	Xander's New Dorm Room	bonnie	Done	21	9/9/2016
Just to get some peace to study, Xander decided to make some ear plugs. But all he could find to make them with was paper mache'. But he ran out of that, too, and didn't have any more newspapers to soupify to make more, so he started tearing pages of his roommate's textbook.
150	Trying to Keep Cool !	betty	Done	22	8/20/2016
I hid behind the shrubs and biting my nails, waited for the manicurist to arrive.
149	The Stump Vine	bonnie	Done	21	4/26/2016
Put all of it in the back of the truck and take it to the dump! And while you are there, make sure you pick up some latticework or fishing line because as the vine grows, it wraps around everything in its path and starts choking the other plants when then in desperation they start to prune it, they don't know such actions are misguided.
148	Laundry	colleen	Done	20	4/2/2016
You know those men in your house don't want to wear pink underwear when I had to go to the locker room at the gym! I was so irritated because the water would not go out of the washer! Was I going to have to dip it out by hand? The only container I could find was a big plastic laundry basket.
147	It's snowing!!!	colleen	Done	29	2/22/2016
Anytime you're walking on ice, you should be careful to look both ways before you sled down the Speights' driveway.
145	Bonnie is Coming for a Visit !!	betty	Done	21	2/5/2016
After they brought it, he strapped it on his chest. her suitcase, that is!
144	Heeeelllllloooooo there!!!	colleen	Done	20	1/10/2016
Ladelling out a serving, I went out on the patio and enjoyed a big bowl of roasted chili peppers. In fact, anyone could just walk in and easily help themselves to croissants, chocolate eclairs, and mugs of steaming beef stew.
143	Resolutions for the New Year !	betty	Done	22	1/9/2016
Soon, you will feel focused and relaxed and ready to go out the front door to my new life! So I put on my hat, opened the door, walked out on to the front porch, and stepped into a new suit! Perfectly pressed and tailored, it did wonders for my mood, and I felt so happy and confident, I called up all my friends and invited them over for a little thing we like to call an "Intervention."
142	Ordering Online Christmas Presents !	betty	Done	21	12/14/2015
Aha! I started avidly looking for it, and found it just where I had hidden it: inside a box. And that box was hidden inside the computer tower!
141	Dual Composters	greg	Done	21	12/13/2015
We started by putting in kitchen scraps. Over time, the bugs, the beetles, and the worms digested the compost, and quietly turned it into rich soil.
140	Deli Bologna	greg	Done	22	11/28/2015
Aaahhh! and proceeded to have a coughing fit that lasted for approximately 20 seconds.
139	Getting Ready for Fall !	betty	Done	21	10/29/2015
That was the last straw! He had had it! He was mad as hell, and wasn't going to take a long time to get through all that! So take a deep breath and enjoy the wonderful fall smell of burning leaves and the aromatic essence of powdered Dramamine, which helped keep my lunch down as the plane bounced and quivered its way to jump altitude.
138	Slatherage	greg	Done	21	9/16/2015
He switched to listening to Peter Furler Band instead and went to put some more shrimp on the barbie, then played footy with his mates until they got attacked by a pack of rabid dingoes.
137	Growing Those Tomatoes !	betty	Done	21	8/1/2015
Tamp down the tourniquets I had to put on my arms after accidentally slicing them with the trowel.
136	Midnight snack	colleen	Done	21	6/11/2015
Now where is that whipped cream and those sugared syrupy pasta dishes, which are only appropriate for Christmastime! You need to remember: it's candy, candy canes, candy corns, and the last of the four main food groups: I cannot even remember because they keep changing the pyramid.
135	That New Smart Phone	betty	Done	22	6/10/2015
Instead I decided to add a new game app. The name of it was Clash of the Terrible Twos. Unpredicatable, delightful, exhausting, outrageous and wonderful, the new ring tone was delightful.
134	NOT A REAL STORY! IGNORE THIS	greg	Done	24	6/3/2015
Well I will show you! I will give you a big fat wallet full of money if you will go over there and smack that bully. We are all getting tired of this continual harassment. And make sure you tell him to bring exact change.
133	Why me!?!!	colleen	Done	23	6/3/2015
Then we'll get a PS4. and sure enough, an F5 tornado appeared out of nowhere and destroyed the whole town and everyone in it, including us.
132	Backyard Projects	betty	Done	22	5/28/2015
I needed to go to the store to buy more straws to build my custom-crafted trellis.
131	Cupcakes!	colleen	Done	22	5/26/2015
Mmmmm. Mmmmmm gooood!!!! So good! Mmmmm. Mmmmmm gooood!!!! Mmmmmmmm! So good! Mmmmm. Mmmmmm gooood!!!! Sweat trickled down his leg and got on the beam, and when he took his next step, he closed his eyes and took the first bite. Mmmmmmmm! So good! Mmmmm. Mmmmmm gooood!!!! But he was nervous!
129	Climbing Enchanted Rock	betty	Done	21	5/2/2015
There, under a little tree, we saw all colors of lichens growing on the bald rock. When I touched one, it felt rough.
128	I Need to Take a Trip !	betty	Done	22	4/16/2015
It was obvious the dog was no fan of the cats! But he was a big fan of just taking a nap! But, noooooo oooooooooo. Oooooooooo.
127	Bonnie's New Tutoring Job	bonnie	Done	27	4/16/2015
Using all that brain power was very draining. I could use a pepper-upper! Maybe there is something in the staff refrigerator I could sample....
126	Getting Ready for New Year's Eve	betty	Done	22	2/18/2015
When the crowd gets here, each person will be handed a bottle and with it they will proceed to decorate the room by sprinkling it everywhere: the carpet, the tables, the chairs were all covered with cat hair! Where are those lint rollers?? I am sure I put them in the sock drawer, next to the loaded gun.
125	New Year's Resolutions	bonnie	Done	22	12/24/2014
So anyone can decide tomorrow will be a new day and when you wake up, the first thing you should do is get an accountability partner. What's that, you say? Well, say you resolve to go jogging every morning.
124	Get Those Presents Wrapped !	betty	Done	22	12/24/2014
26....where was it??I found all of it in the back of the car. The first step is to acquire the presents. Second, you have to get someone to put their finger in the middle of a bow, so you can pull out just as much as you need.
123	We Need a Plumber !	betty	Done	22	12/12/2014
So we went into the crawl space and lo and behold! We found a small box, sealed to be watertight! How did that get there? It has to be Vodka! Sweet lifeblood of our glorious mother country, it falls like water from the skies and collects in pools.
122	Christmas Decorations	bonnie	Done	22	12/12/2014
Some people think they are dead! But they're just acting. They're just lying there waiting to be strung from shrub to shrub.
121	I Just Could Not Stop Playing That Video Game !!	betty	Done	21	11/28/2014
We're doing an intervention." Of course, this was completely ludicrous to me because I always like to play solo and joining a team at this juncture would be such a bad idea that my Hot Pockets supply would be depleted, and I would also run out of a deep dark tunnel lined with spider webs and hanging from the ceiling were bats!
120	The Great Beyond	xander	Done	21	9/21/2014
I figured that third choice made perfect sense because he had just eaten a loaf of bread the size of his head. He then extemporaneously launched into song. he declared, "And it's dedicated to freezing peoples' brains so they can be revived at a later date.
119	Summer	bonnie	Done	20	9/21/2014
Pack wisely, because the ants and mice can get into any little crevice to eat carefully prepared a series of dangerous, deadly traps leading up to my bathroom. My wife insisted I was being paranoid, but I had to be absolutely certain that the air conditioner would never break down again.
118	Best Video Game of the Year !	betty	Done	22	8/15/2014
I handed them to the nurse, but she shook her head and said, " Oh my!!! What a garbled mess this has become!!! At least I was able to kill all the drop bears and goblins, well, sort of, I guess."
117	The best movie EVER!!!	colleen	Done	21	7/18/2014
"They'll never ever find their way outta here with all the lights out!
116	What I Saw When I Took A Walk II	greg	Done	23	5/28/2014
Humvees, trucks, tanks on trailers, and even a snail could have gone around the block faster than that turtle which was stampeding through peanut butter.
115	You know...	bonnie	Done	23	11/10/2013
In the morning. I LOVE IT! It smells like victory and then, when you least expect to find roly poly bugs in the flower pots. One must get rid of them by voting for the Republican candidate! Do you want more freedom?
114	Whatever is on your mind !	betty	Done	24	10/27/2013
This is a job for a professional! Do not try to eat beans that have not been cooked long enough.. They may cause a tremendous amount of gas and you will feel quite light-headed. The remedy for that is to be totally relaxed, have warm socks on your feet, and be ready to tackle the quarterback!
113	Nursery Rhyme	greg	Done	22	10/24/2013
To test it, we inserted a non-compete clause into the document. It now read, "I (fill in your name) will not directly or indirectly engage in any business that competes with the cupboard of Old Mother Hubbard."
112	Global Warming !	betty	Done	26	8/19/2013
Happiness is cozy, soft, and green. How could anyone argue against me? Do they want to get punched? Do they want me bring the thunder? Do they want clean air or warm houses? They cannot have both !!
110	Planning a trip to Texas...or Virginia !	betty	Done	22	4/19/2013
My mouth began to water and I ran for the ramp for the plane, but just as I reached it, they started pulling up the stairs, and then I loudly screamed, " HOW CAN THIS BE SO COMPLICATED?!?!?!" Covering my face with my hands, I took a few deep breaths and tried to calm down.
109	Thanksgiving	bonnie	Done	19	12/19/2012
And just my luck, I'm right in the middle of a shower! But what if it's important? What if we ran out of food?!! Would any stores be open? I opened the phone book to look for Christmas presents. she exclaimed, "It's not even Thanksgiving yet, and already you're behind schedule!"
108	I Blew Up My Lab!	greg	Done	21	10/26/2012
So bright. So beautiful. prrrecciouusss... Those hobbitses are always stealing from us. Those nasty little roaches were everywhere! Someone must have left food in here! Ah, I found an old lunch bag! And in it were stale pieces of air.
107	Christmas Shopping III	betty	Done	21	2/11/2012
The darkness was so complete it was like a solid thing--a suffocating blanket of oblivion that clung to our faces and enveloped us in its lifeless embrace.
106	Let's Organize Your Garage !	betty	Done	22	7/25/2011
How can you expect to be able to deal with the revenooers properly if all your ordnance is in such slaphappy disorder?
105	Christmas Shopping II	greg	Done	21	2/24/2011
Actually, I searched and searched for a good parking place and finally had to resort to getting a handful of gift cards at Wawa. Unimaginative yes, but quick and simple. But, while I was there, I decided to go ahead and order dessert.
103	Zombie Attack!	greg	Done	22	6/10/2010
Help me reload my shotgun! That dern zombie took a chunk out of my arm and I can barely keep my eyelids open!
102	The Art of Decluttering	betty	Done	21	8/4/2009
As a male, I know how to get things done. And the first thing to do is play a few missions in City Of Heroes just to get your blood flowing. The next thing to do would be have a fire sale! Anything that didn't get sold would become kindling for the bonfire that would be against my better judgment to put the white underwear into the same drawer as the colored butterflies streamed through the sewer line so fast that everyone thought, "
101	The hathood of the traveling brown hat.	rhonda	Done	21	3/20/2009
We surrepticiously crossed the street and found a a secret cave lined with dozens of bats and hundreds of poopy tax return pages. "Hmm, he must have run out of TP and used this instead." But this wouldn't help me find the hat. What I needed was a big eagle's feather!
100	The Nephews come to Visit	greg	Done	22	12/9/2008
While he was waiting, the UPS man came bringing a big package. When the nephews opened it, they found an enormous pile of puke the cats had upchucked! Xander exclaimed, " I am so hungry I could eat a WHOLE pizza!" A tall glass of lemonade would taste good after eating that Pop Burger, he was still hungry, so he ordered another one!
99	Laser Eye Surgery	greg	Done	20	10/3/2008
Could it possibly lead to early development of cataracts? I need to know because who wants to be blind for the rest of his life?!!" I decided to get a second opinion. The new doctor examined me, and with a big smile on his face, said to me, "
98	Abiathar the Superhero!	greg	Done	21	4/27/2007
So Abiathar asked him to pass the potatoes. Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we do some serious bashing! After dinner, he got to his feet and threw a zombie up in the air with his Jawbreaker, while at the same time he grabbed a troll by the ankle, spun him around and launched him into orbit with one flick of his manly wrist.
97	My New Video Game!	betty	Done	21	3/13/2007
Oh Boy! I got a new video game! I could hardly wait to get home to play it! I got home, opened the box, and inside I saw a giant strawberry! I could use it to make dessert with. I got my first 100 points with my first 100 kills.
96	Fixing up my Garden	greg	Done	22	1/29/2007
Get out of my flowers!" But they were eating all the leaves off my periwinkles. This calls for action! So I mixed up a poison solution and poured it on the fire to put it out!
95	Rearranging My New Tech Room	betty	Done	22	1/31/2007
No geek worth his salt would be caught dead without that telltale orange tint on his fingertips. mixed with cables, network cards, and little plastic bags of ICs of every conceivable kind.
94	Speeding Down the Highway	betty	Done	21	12/4/2006
I really needed a new line of work. There just isn't as much money in moving moonshine across state lines like there used to be. So I decided to turn in my driver's license and buy a bicycle.
93	Having Surgery	greg	Done	20	12/1/2006
What I want is for all this bleeding to stop!" I've lived a long, full life and don't have any regrets. What I want is for all this bleeding to stop!" Watch me make this incision, and I don't want anybody to cry when I'm gone.
92	Accountant at Work	greg	Done	21	4/1/2006
We also put out a wide variety of chewed pencils which seemed to be coated with a sticky layer of Glue-Stik glue, the kind you get from the Dollar Store.
91	What I Saw When I Took a Walk	betty	Done	21	3/31/2006
So I took my cell phone and quickly dialed for help. I was in desperate straits!
90	Learning a Foreign Language	greg	Done	22	2/4/2006
So we got cream pies in the face from those angry Frenchmen. Then we retaliated with a barrage of German invective. we snarled informally. Shocked, he picked his beret out of the muddy gutter, shook it off and put it on his resume. This will surely impress them! They'll be so impressed they will spew!
89	Putting out Christmas Lights	betty	Done	21	2/3/2006
Would I really get to see Santa Claus??? We rushed to the roof and searched for hoofprints in the snow, but all we found were stale, broken gingerbread cookies from last year.
88	Lazor Beam Hydra	greg	Done	22	12/16/2005
Please don't eat me! I promise to stay out of your way, and believe me, you'll never know that I used a degreazor! It looks brand new!
87	Concert at Chrysler Hall	betty	Done	21	12/14/2005
Just look at those people who are wearing outfits that must have cost in the quadruple digits. I was thinking Goldman and Sachs.
86	Touring Europe	bonnie	Done	21	12/13/2005
But to my surprise, he snapped the cork out of the bottle of champagne out poured it on my pancakes. Famished, I dug in with reckless abandon. For dessert I asked for English Trifle, a scrumptuous dessert of whipped cream, fresh fruit, and sponge cake soaked with nervous sweat.
85	Christmas Shopping	betty	Done	22	12/1/2005
The only thing that was still bugging me was what to get for the person on my list that was the hardest to buy for: my loud and noxious neighbor.
84	Working at McDonald's	greg	Done	21	12/1/2005
I tried not to smirk when the customer called me "Luv". I knew she was from Guinea, especially when she proceeded to order a Whopper...oops, this is McDonald's!!!
83	Trip to the Pumpkin Patch	sherry	Done	22	11/7/2005
Meanwhile, the rest of the group went to the raspberry patch and had a raspberry war!!
82	test2	greg	Done	24	9/16/2015
I said. "I don't have any idea what you are talking about. There's no title, no subject...How would I begin to know what you mean? I think you should take a break now in order to crush those who oppose us."
81	Going Into Space II	greg	Done	21	10/28/2005
What! No light speed??? Would it help if I released the emergency brake? She smiled sweetly and pushed the button that sent them all hurtling into a black hole.
80	Taking Computer Class	betty	Done	20	10/27/2005
taking this class. In fact most of the students looked at least as old as MS-DOS. Which would put it at about 25 years old.
79	Cooking Show II	greg	Done	21	9/27/2005
With a maniacal howl, he headed straight for the audience and handed out free samples.
78	Potty Training the Twins	betty	Done	21	9/24/2005
To do this, you just need a lot of patience. One day at a time, we worked at moving the vast quantities of toddler turds out of the house. We used snow shovels most of the time, but sometimes we used cloth diapers when we ran out of all the clean air in the house was being gradually contaminated by the encroaching fog of green stench.
77	Noisy Neighbors	bonnie	Done	21	9/23/2005
I mean it. They must be major weightlifters because that's exactly what it sounds like: dumbells on the floor next to my barbell and other weight equipment.
76	Driving Across Country	betty	Done	22	9/16/2005
Finally we were leaving the driveway! The car was packed to the gills with all sorts of gear for the trip: camera, food, maps, you name it. But I still had the feeling I wasn't in Kansas anymore...Maybe it was the mountains that painted the horizon or simply the fact that there wasn't a corn field in sight.
75	NASCAR Days	greg	Done	21	9/9/2005
So it would be better to replace the little Honda engine that sounds like a lawnmower with a Chevy big block, which was just delivered by Jeff Gordon himself!
74	Conserving Water	bonnie	Done	22	9/9/2005
In fact, everything we bought cost a dollar! Then we realized we were in a progessive town because our hotel room had "hot water on demand": to conserve the water that normally runs down the sink while you're waiting for it to get hot, there were small water heaters installed right next to the toilet was a strange-looking water saving device.
73	The Best Diet Ever!	sherry	Done	21	8/31/2005
Stuff like what to get and what to avoid at the grocery, how to eat out smartly, and above all, remember it's not about a number, it's about how you feel!
72	What a Yard Sale!	betty	Done	20	8/23/2005
It feels SO GOOD to relax now and do my yoga exercises! I am so limber I bet I could put my foot under my bra.
71	Test Pilot	greg	Done	21	8/17/2005
Don't be alarmed at a change in plans, just make your face like flint, give it full throttle and close your eyes! Now the fun begins! The co-pilot thought I was kidding, but far be it from me to let him know what was really going on.
70	A Day in the Life of a Dork	sherry	Done	21	8/14/2005
Boy! Am I a Dork! Can you tell that I am a MENSA member? My IQ is higher than my weight." "Oh really? she said with a wink. Great googlely-mooglely...that was just about the nicest thing anyone had ever said!
69	Time for a Checkup!	bonnie	Done	21	8/3/2005
But when I got there, the doctor said "Ma'am, I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you this, but that's not how you're supposed to wear the hospital gown."
68	Building My New Cat Condo	betty	Done	21	7/10/2005
It will spark so much interest, you'll be building the biggest mega-cat-condo in the world! All I have to do is take all this extra cat litter and put it in the display case at the local Pet Store.
67	Putting Up Wallpaper	greg	Done	21	6/12/2005
Then I went back downstairs and fixed myself a meatball lunch pocket. It was so good, I licked it again. "Hey! Quit that! You're getting wallpaper paste all in my hair! uh oh, I'm all out. That's OK, because we bought extra rolls just in case. Try to line up the red hexagons so they match.
66	My Newest Home Improvement Project!	betty	Done	20	5/17/2005
After all that hard work, the value of the property went up so much I got an offer I couldn't refuse, and I moved into a condo. and it will also help you store things."
65	Phone Call	bonnie	Done	21	5/9/2005
"Fine, How are you?" "I'm fine! I wanted to ask if you knew there is a moose in your front yard! He seems to be trying to find candidates for his galactic space marine training academy. "I'm only 18!"
64	Airline Pilot	greg	Done	21	4/23/2005
And it seemed to be getting closer! It might just be a squadron of Zentraedi fighters, looking for easy human prey! They're in for a big surprise because our landing wheels won't come down.
63	I'm Not In It For The...	bonnie	Done	21	4/6/2005
'Cause honey, I ain't in it for the cocoa, I'm in it for the marshmallows! So bring on the orcs! I'm not afraid of them! Bring on ogres, giants, even dragons, they won't stop me! Because I'm Mr. Moneybags, and I want more of your money; so invest in my new scheme or I will promptly sign your autograph with an elaborate flourish.
62	Hosting a Cooking Show	betty	Done	21	4/12/2005
Mix it in with the scrambled eggs and you will have a breakfast served to you in several courses, as I finish each section of the show. I have staff who will divide the German blood sausage into enough pieces so that everyone can have at least a Eastern European immigrant would have more good taste than the fresh-faced yahoos we've been putting on this show.
61	Ain't It Cool?	greg	Done	22	4/7/2005
We're talking flames comin' out of the freakin' wheel wells, a Confederate flag on either side, and the hood a big ol' skull ring -- solid silver! And a tattoo to match! and on the back it would say "got r00t?"
60	Competing with Starbuck's	bonnie	Done	21	4/2/2005
Make them feel welcome! Here, I'll show you." With that, she turned around and punched her in the face as hard as she could. She flipped right over the counter!
59	My First Ocean Cruise	betty	Done	21	3/28/2005
" I could have told you he was crazy, and everyone would have agreed with me, but still, no one could believe what he did next: he set the throttle to flank speed, and ran the ship aground, right in the middle of the beach!
58	Captain Underpants	greg	Done	21	3/23/2005
But there wasn't time to even think! My face was reddening by the second. Before much longer I would surely be able to flush it all down with this high-flow toilet!
57	New Year's Resolutions!	bonnie	Done	21	3/18/2005
He was irritated. Calmly, she answered, "I'm thinking if we ate nothing but lettuce and skim milk for a month we may look good for the St. Valentine's Day party. And I'm all for a healthy diet, but don't you think you're taking it a little far?"
56	Saturday Morning's Cartoon Marathon	betty	Done	21	3/13/2005
It's all about finding the sources of disposable cellphones. See, in the future, so many people had been using disposable cellphones that the landfills were overflowing with them and people were dying in disposable cellphone avalanches.
55	Spy Base Alpha	greg	Done	21	3/8/2005
He said to watch out for Doctor Doom! His latest information reported that there was a severe shortage of toilet paper. Now what?
54	Texas Winter	bonnie	Done	20	3/3/2005
Ah the warm desert air blowing from the west, bringing with it a great deal of heat.
53	Christmas Shopping - 2004	betty	Done	20	2/26/2005
I have a wallet full of money and all kinds of sales to go to. I must make a list of people whom I want to give back to the community. My present to them will be 40 hours of community service. I'll be dragging my behind after I finish all this shopping.
52	Modeling Agency	greg	Done	21	2/21/2005
But that's OK. that's right... Perfect! She's a door. The next girl can pose on this poof chair. It is shaped like a high-heeled shoe. How mod! I wonder who thought up that idea. It must have been Mr. Fleschmarkt who authorized that! You know it's against procedure to wear more clothes than can be stored in a purse.
51	All I Need Is...	bonnie	Done	21	2/16/2005
in which case jelly doughnuts will be your best bet. Of course everyone knows in addition to trays of sugary pastries, you should add bountiful numbers of rose petals to your bath!
50	My Summer at the Archeological Dig	betty	Done	21	2/11/2005
Dust, dust, dust! My hair was matted with mud and straw. We started carefully cleaning it, and were surprised to discover that under the dirt was the wrapper from my Brown Mule. Oh I could be in big trouble! I quickly stuck it into my hat. No one would find it there.
49	Shopping at Lowe's	greg	Done	20	2/6/2005
With that, I checked that no one was looking and threw my M&M's wrapper into the display toilet. But just as I turned around a man in a green overall quickly began to fall! Tumbling down the chute came a big load of bricks! Yikes! Get out of the way!
48	Anorexia Therapy	bonnie	Done	21	2/1/2005
Because that's where you are, you know-- but try not to think about it. It's counter-productive. Stay focused on eating everything in sight. You may end up being bulimic, but at least that won't kill you. Probably. Your other alternative is to eat yogurt 3 times a day. To add to the great nutritional value of the yogurt, you can add chopped tuna.
47	Building My New House!	betty	Done	23	1/27/2005
As for a hard, scratch-resistant cutting surface, I chose muraled tempered glass.
46	Ultimate Ninja II	greg	Done	21	1/22/2005
he said, his breath knocked out all the windows in the art studio. Paint, easels, brushes were all flying out the window and straight into the exit tunnel!
45	Election Day!	betty	Done	21	1/17/2005
What a prize! I bet I could sell them on E-Bay for at least a hundred hours. At the conclusion of it all, we were exhausted and hungry. So we went to the front of the line to show our voter cards.
44	A Day in the Life of...	bonnie	Done	20	1/12/2005
Such a rich food source! And nearby! A messenger was sent to the prison chaplain's office to plead his case. If he didn't get out soon, he'd die. He soon heard that Spot next door was wearing a flea collar. What a wimp. Barrister has no use for such "jewelry". Maybe he should just walk over and slap around the intruder!
43	High School Carwash	greg	Done	20	1/7/2005
Money money money. We took some of the money and used it for wiping up the spoiled milk in the back seat. Boy, did it stink! It smelled like the driver must be a smoker. Frowning, we decided we could first try vacuuming up all the fragments of dried vomit.
42	Pushed Over the Edge	bonnie	Done	21	1/2/2005
You know I think I can analyze your problem. Can you give me a sample of your artwork. Our analysis of that will give us a lot of insight into your mental problems." I said to him, "My only problem is YOUR ugly face.
41	Cleaning Out the Garage	betty	Done	21	12/28/2004
Enuf into the freezer to get cold. It will really taste good with a piece of moldy bread!" Who knows how long that had been there! "That's disgusting!" I said. "We're going to need some industrial-strength cleaner! Russell used some when he worked at Busch; let's call him." So we called Russell to check out the buckets of unknown substance in the far corner.
40	HULK SMASH!	greg	Done	20	12/23/2004
Russell screeched, and yelled, " IT MUST BE SOMEWHERE, BUT WHERE?!" Bricks were flying , windows shattering, the asphalt rippled and disintegrated with every impact.
39	Joining the PTA	bonnie	Done	20	12/18/2004
A bundle of sticks is not easily glued together to make a log cabin for a school project. In fact, to collect all the sticks needed, the teachers and parents had to come to some sort of agreement.
38	Going to the County Fair	betty	Done	20	12/13/2004
How it gleamed in the mid-afternoon light. Mesmerized, I reached out to touch it. "NINJA!" Startled, I turned around to see a Ferris wheel toppling over, about to smash dozens of people into tiny bits! I screamed for help! Out of the corner of my eye I saw someone.
37	News at 11	greg	Done	20	12/8/2004
Frantically, the police captain called a temp agency. They worked around the clock sweeping all the flood waters out of the newsroom.
36	Investigating Vegetarianism	bonnie	Done	21	12/3/2004
Here comes the bacon cheeseburger cart. And the fudge sundae cart behind that. Get ready to mash those soybeans and mold the tofu into shapes resembling flowers.
35	Boppy's Trip to Texas	betty	Done	21	11/28/2004
You have home-made napalm. I love the smell of cedar. You can just sit in the shade of the trees and enjoy the breeze and listen to the crunching of the tacos, the sloshing of the margaritas, and the sizzling of the fajitas.
34	Dance Class	bonnie	Done	21	11/23/2004
So we played a boom box until the windows started to tremble. We lowered the volume just in time before the other dancer jumps over you. The idea is to create the picture of water with the water birds in it.
33	The Minotaur King	greg	Done	21	11/18/2004
Otherwise you can also rub on some invisibility potion. Then we could more safely find our way there. So many dangers beset us, we scarcely conceived of ever making it through the maze alive. Giant scorpions, venomous snakes and worse hounded our every step.
32	The Bizarre Bazaar	bonnie	Done	20	11/13/2004
I could find only one and it was moth-eaten and shedding bits of leprous skin with every step. "What are you doing here?"
31	My Trip Around the World	betty	Done	21	11/8/2004
We might even end up with hemmorhoids so bad we won't even be able to sit down. declared Paspartout with a rakish grin.
30	Downtown Precinct	greg	Done	22	11/3/2004
To clean them, he will probably want us to use stun guns. "Have you had any experience with those?"
29	Growing Up on a Farm	betty	Done	21	10/29/2004
The dirt from my past several weeks of work had crusted upon itself to the point that it could begin to flake off in great chunks, and I could see the blue cloth beneath. I set out to be the fastest, bestest, rootin'-tootin'est cow milker in the whole state.
28	The Dinosaur World	bonnie	Done	21	10/24/2004
If we do that we might not survive the night! No. We've got to conserve our ammunition, collect what food we have left, and prepare to broil some tasty dinosaur patties. Yeah, with a bun and onion and Miracle Whip and tomato and a few sliced radishes on the side, we'll have quite a dinner, as obviously there's no shortage of fresh meat around here!"
27	Gardening with Betty	greg	Done	20	10/19/2004
There is no better smell except for the smell of tulips, lavender, and freshly cut grass. Oh yes, and don't forget the fresh-baked biscuits that were brought to us by UPS, the BROWN people. We helped unload the truck and opened the boxes, and inside we found numerous ants!
26	On the Open Road	bonnie	Done	21	10/14/2004
She scrambled out of the car as soon as she regained consciousness enough to realize she was IN A CAR! she slurred with anger.
25	The International Village	bonnie	Done	21	10/9/2004
Celina wasn't scared of alligators. She'd been in the river back home in Brazil many times with them.
24	Weekend in Paris	greg	Done	21	10/4/2004
Go ahead!" She wanted to, but couldn't. Tears filled her eyes and she turned and began to run away.
23	Xander Goes Shopping	betty	Done	22	9/29/2004
We had to agree it was a good idea. But what to do next? And where to go next? I think we should go over to the hardware department and we can look for some Transformers!
22	Fart Dictionary	bonnie	Done	21	9/24/2004
If others are present, your only hope is to fart again, only this time fart harder, and hopefully it'll be toxic enough to kill any witnesses. The fact is I cannot believe Bonnie started this story!
21	Boot Camp	greg	Done	21	9/19/2004
But not good if your feet were covered with blisters, stuck with splinters, and if the ground oozed with the green slime from that pond we sloshed through earlier, while holding up our rifles so they wouldn't get wet!
20	Good Old Pop's Drive-in	betty	Done	21	9/14/2004
Aim it that way!" Quickly, I retrieved the wiggling hose and finished cleaning up. Nervously, I looked up at him to see the whole congregation of Lighthouse Worship Center walk through the door right behind him.
19	Going Back to College	betty	Done	21	9/9/2004
I gasped. An old lady, bent with age, shuffled out of the shadows. "You thought this place was abandoned because it is so dirty and unkempt, but that is the way the students like it.
18	If You Give a Mouse a Cookie	bonnie	Done	21	9/4/2004
If you give a mouse a cookie, he's probably going to want some milk to go with it, and if you give him some milk, he may think he's a cat.
17	Our Summer Vacation	betty	Done	21	8/30/2004
It scared me too much and when I got to the bottom, I hit a Honda Civic! But since I was in a Hummer, i just kind of rolled over him and kept on going." "That's terrible, who would have thought ice cream could melt so fast!
16	Trapped in a Mine	greg	Done	21	8/25/2004
And that's ALL I NEED. And this dead battery. And this rock. And this lawn chair. And that's ALL I NEED!" People began to stare at him because he had a pale green luminescence about him.
14	Our Visit to the Library	bonnie	Done	21	8/15/2004
With a bunch of boomboxes on max volume? That'll liven things up around here!" Alas, every book in the entire library was checked out.
13	Stress Reduction Techniques	bonnie	Done	23	8/10/2004
That is an excellent way to direct energy. Positive in through the nose, negative out through the chimney and up, up, the explosion launched debris 30 feet into the air. Bonnie immediately began stuffing more explosives into the fireplace and said "I feel less stressed already!
12	My New Job at Burger King	betty	Done	20	8/5/2004
Now we're in trouble. The Sheriff will think we have turned into an opium den. What to do?! Maybe we should replace them with soy. Do you think anyone would be able to get all those wads of gum from underneath the tables?
11	Cooking with Grandma	betty	Done	22	7/31/2004
After only a few minutes they began to hatch. "I don't know what to do with all these eggshells.
10	Ultimate Ninja	greg	Done	22	7/26/2004
It left them with a taste they shall never forget. Such is the power of the ULTIMATE NINJA. And again what is that POWER? It is the power of the universe! The power that enables the ULTIMATE NINJA to unleash hundreds if not thousands of punches and kicks upon any who opposed him.
8	Wall Street Blues	greg	Done	22	7/16/2004
Needless to say, this constant Super-Sizing only led to the bottom dropping out of the market.
7	Going into Space	betty	Done	21	7/11/2004
asked Sam, quizzically. the officer replied, "It's the illegal immigrants, the aliens, we give them to. They bathe in artificial dihydrogen monoxide which was produced in a laboratory manned by hyper-intelligent mice.
5	Ye Olde Medieval Days	betty	Done	21	7/1/2004
he cried, "Save me from the hallowed gallows! I will eat at your feet for the rest of my days!" The king looked down at him and replied," and then threw back his own with peals of diabolical laughter. Thus began the century-long "Reign of Terror." As he drew nearer he saw to his horror, the king had been slain by a pack of eldritch blagglecruncheons!
4	Barrister the Lawyer Cat	betty	Done	21	6/26/2004
I need a break." So she put down her pencil and went to hell in a handbasket. That's what the country's coming to. A parking lot here, a parking lot there, and pretty soon you've got some real evidence there!
3	The Big Conundrum	betty	Done	21	6/21/2004
Then you do it again with a bigger stick. You continue this until you're an ultimate ninja, and we will all thumb our noses at you, because your strength will be like a river, rushing along pell mell with not a backward glance, gleefully heading for a sure collision with that wall!
2	Woo baby!	greg	Done	21	6/16/2004
exclaimed Betty. "You deep-fried carrots sticks???" Bonnie nodded gleefully, and handed her a big basket of individually wrapped rolls of toilet paper. A bonus to be sure!
1	Big Computer	greg	Done	18	6/11/2004
When he opened the cabinet, Lo, and behold, he found his missing bottle of pills. Oh, how he had suffered without them! Now, long gone would be the pain. How he remembered when he had broken his wrist playing badmitton with an orc. Apparently the orc thought it would be pretty darn funny to replace the shuttlecock with a BRAND NEW CAR!