Betty's Turn-Down Game

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Story ID	Title	Creator	Status	Num Entries	Date Finished
174	Springtime in Virginia	betty	Done	22	12/27/2022
And small wonder, too. Even the cars had turned yellow from the Halls of Montezuma to the shores of Tripoli! Where did we land? We landed right in a big pile of dry leaves! The pleasant earthy smell of po-tay-toes! Boil em, mash em, stick inna stew! which reminds me I haven't eaten a meal yet today.
173	Daylight Saving Time !	betty	Done	23	4/21/2021
There was a collective exhale and then an immediate inhale, because the last thing we wanted was a fainting crowd! But there truly was a big sigh of relief followed by the idea of shoring up the outer wall with bits of furniture and old crates.
172	A Winter Day in the Wilderness	bonnie	Done	22	2/15/2021
The snowfall of the previous days dampened the sound; there was only a slight rustling of tree branches as the wind brushed over the hills.
171	Oh, the weather outside is frightful...	betty	Done	22	12/31/2020
We apprehensively and slowly pulled back a drape and saw to our wonderment and dismay a large thunderstorm right in our path!
170	The McAvoys' Big Turkey Dinner!	betty	Done	23	1/13/2020
Winston walked into the kichen and he immediately started to thaw it. After about 8 hours, the turkey was halfway cooked.
169	A Breath of Fresh Air	bonnie	Done	22	11/15/2019
He realized he broke a string in the last movement! he mentally mumbled to himself. motion across his neck.
168	Toiling at 3 a.m.	betty	Done	22	10/13/2019
It would have been a terrifying sound at any time, but hearing at 3am was the worst.
167	The Reckoning of the Kiwis	xander	Done	22	7/28/2019
It was right now! I'm so thirsty I feel like I could drink ALL the soda. I jumped to my feet and cried out because I hit my head on an overhanging tree branch!
166	Somebody's Gotta Do It !	betty	Done	22	7/8/2019
Sometimes I had to open a can of sardines! I pulled back the lid and the smell was questionable, like peanut butter mixed with half and half and a dollop of warm heavy cream. What cat could resist that??
165	I love Thunderstorms !	betty	Done	21	6/10/2019
Louis to their destination. And when they got there they found lots of fancy chocolate truffles." True to his word, he pulled a variety of gourmet chocolates from his pocket and unwrapped one, eating it in a single bite.
164	Wrapping those Christmas Presents !	betty	Done	23	1/9/2019
It was then I finally realized as I reflected on everything that had happened, that this had truly been the best Christmas ever! And everyone vowed, "I won't stop until I get my revenge on you!" It was then I finally realized as I reflected on everything that had happened, that this had truly been the best Christmas ever!
163	Let's Set Fire to the Woods	xander	Done	21	12/7/2018
It's got vitamins, minerals, and amino acids. Everything your body needs. But it looks and tastes like snot so wash it down with very dry sticks and pine straw.
162	Some Kind of Adventure	xander	Done	23	9/10/2018
Let's call up a Harvard professor and ask him if he knows why the room is glowing orange. He'll probably say, "You dunderhead! Obviously it's because I did not have a flying carpet when I needed one!" Now what? Here I am, stuck up on this remote control for the Blu-Ray player.
161	That Garage !	betty	Done	22	8/9/2018
What a find! I think they should be displayed in the Alamo gift shop! Right next to all the boxes full of stuff ready to donate to the thrift store! I felt soooo proud! Man! What a find! I think they should be displayed in the Alamo gift shop! Right next to all the boxes full of stuff ready to donate to the thrift store!
160	I need a Summer Job ! What should it be ?	betty	Done	24	8/3/2018
There's something to be said for being out in the sunshine and fresh air, so maybe I should think about wearing rubber gloves when I am washing the dishes at Jim's.
159	A large, healthy tuft of stump grass	bonnie	Done	22	7/18/2018
Mesmerized, we ate popcorn and drank beer while the spectacle continued. Eventually we ran out of mushroom booze. Granted, the stuff makes you hallucinate, but it tastes like liquid gold. I couldn't imagine walking one more mile without at least a gallon of the stuff on hand, so I started scrounging around for old rags to wipe up the spilled lemonade and the big pool of melted popsicles.
158	Cleaning up after Milo the Mouse	betty	Done	21	7/11/2018
But Boppy exclaimed, "I can't kill it if I've named it!" No one could argue with that. But here's another question: if you've named a mouse Milo, can you ever set out a mousetrap for him? In his pathways, for him can you ever place a trap?
157	Taking a Walking Tour of the UTSA Campus	betty	Done	22	7/6/2017
There, I was greeted by a flock of trained roadrunners!
156	San Antonio Vacation	greg	Done	22	5/27/2017
I don't want no yankee syrup. I may as well have this with a side of socialism and a hot mug of Bernie Sanders Uber Alles. Give me a bottle of Mrs. of A!" She then pounded the table for emphasis, causing all the stray animals to congregate in Bonnie's back yard.
155	Will That Snow Ever Melt? !	betty	Done	21	2/5/2017
That makes driving safer because I was wearing my hiking boots that had traction straps stretched around them. These featured steel posts that would dig into the ice so you can melt the snow so you can flush your toilet!
154	Different Pizza Toppings	greg	Done	21	1/11/2017
MMMM! DELICIOUS! We finally decided to DIG IN! MMMM! DELICIOUS! I've been waiting for at least 60 minutes we were in a quandary of what to do... We finally decided to DIG IN! MMMM!
153	But I don't want to!	bonnie	Done	20	11/13/2016
We are sick and tired of it. I put it into the same category as washing the dog: every day is overkill, but waiting a month is too long."
152	We Need More Enthusiasm !	betty	Done	22	10/16/2016
It's always a boost to the self-confidence when the person in charge starts ranting and raving, maybe someone needs to pour on his head a bucket of vomit!
151	Xander's New Dorm Room	bonnie	Done	21	9/9/2016
But he ran out of that, too, and didn't have any more newspapers to soupify to make more, so he started tearing pages of his roommate's textbook. The title of it was How to Win at Minecraft! Bonus! came over and saw the title, He exclaimed, " There's literally a party going on in the hall outside my door!"
150	Trying to Keep Cool !	betty	Done	22	8/20/2016
The immediate effect was the perspiration started evaporating and I felt so cool! So cool that that I had to put on a show to impress the neighbors. They were unfortunately unimpressed, and said haul that big garden cart over here!
149	The Stump Vine	bonnie	Done	21	4/26/2016
No matter what we do it always turns out to be time to make more Greg Pizza! Besides the regular beef and pepperoni topping, I also had too many solar lights in the yard. A neighbor said I was using up too much sunshine. Irritated, I told her to quit telling me that the Stump Vine exists.
148	Laundry	colleen	Done	20	4/2/2016
What a great product! And the name of it was " Your dearest wish come true."
147	It's snowing!!!	colleen	Done	29	2/22/2016
We gathered all of that together and put them in a laundry basket." These are handy to have around & have many uses. The ideal number to have for a typical household is two dozen. One never wants to run out of Beefaroni and Coke Zero.
145	Bonnie is Coming for a Visit !!	betty	Done	21	2/5/2016
It had the monogram "A", which I thought stood for "Ackerson", but it actually was 4 hours before we finally got out of Costco ! Before we left Bonnie go garnished with parsley and those mini hot peppers. But, they were so hungry that they did not have enough cash to pay for the purchases at Costco, so they emptied all their pockets and ended up with the dollar amount of $ 4, payable in two Thomas Jefferson bills.
144	Heeeelllllloooooo there!!!	colleen	Done	20	1/10/2016
When will it come back on?? I am so bored!! I might as well take a nap. It's cold & cloudy today, so I am going to find my fur gloves and my fur hat, and put them on my dresser next to my collection of Birkenstocks and in fact, they were taking up so much floor space, that I had to rearrange a few things so that it would boil and roil and steam was rising rapidly.
143	Resolutions for the New Year !	betty	Done	22	1/9/2016
I resolve to think before I speak and bite my tongue if I feel inclined to improve myself. First I took a personality test and I turned out to be an introvert. So I thought I would work on that and turned to the person next to me, and I said to him "
142	Ordering Online Christmas Presents !	betty	Done	21	12/14/2015
It's like free money!! and who would that be? !! That would be SANTA!! The only one who delivers more Christmas presents than UPS! But you know he needs all the help he can get, and you can help by registering all your information on the website, so every time from then on you won't have to type in your office on your clicky-clacky IBM keyboard from 1981.
141	Dual Composters	greg	Done	21	12/13/2015
!!! That way it will be super-easy to make tons of money selling homemade compost !! We positioned it right at the end of a row of green beans. !!! That way it will be super-easy to make tons of money selling homemade compost !! And that is what we advertise at our little roadside stand.
140	Deli Bologna	greg	Done	22	11/28/2015
Stunned, the grocer just stood there holding the orange he had been peeling, he squeezed it a little too hard and a spurt flew directly into his display of twenty-five varieties of Deli Bologna!
139	Getting Ready for Fall !	betty	Done	21	10/29/2015
But the skydive instructor wouldn't relent. he yelled over the noise of the plane's engines.
138	Slatherage	greg	Done	21	9/16/2015
Creeping forward, he spotted a fire ant hill right in his path !!
137	Growing Those Tomatoes !	betty	Done	21	8/1/2015
But then I spied flying across the full moon, a big hulking tomato like I had never seen!
136	Midnight snack	colleen	Done	21	6/11/2015
Who cares anyway as long as you get enough Vitamin D. But that might be tricky to manage AT MIDNIGHT! You'll have to rely on supplements or special blended shakes fortified with lead?!?!? Seriously, lead?!?!? Who puts that in a box of chocolate covered cherries.
135	That New Smart Phone	betty	Done	22	6/10/2015
Why then would you not want that? Obviously, life would be easier with a million bucks. So I started taking classes on business at the local community college. I also took my time thinking up a good password. too smart for me" !! I just gave up and started playing Soda Crush.
134	NOT A REAL STORY! IGNORE THIS	greg	Done	24	6/3/2015
Whaaaaat are you saying? You think I'm stupid? Well I will show you! I will give you a big fat wallet full of money if you will go over there and smack that bully. We are all getting tired of this continual harassment. And make sure you tell him to bring exact change.
133	Why me!?!!	colleen	Done	23	6/3/2015
We want to make our own peanut butter in our new electric hot tub.
132	Backyard Projects	betty	Done	22	5/28/2015
Grabbing my car keys, I hurried up to Lowe's to buy some mulch. It was on sale !!When I checked out I had bought so many bags, the total number came to 21.
131	Cupcakes!	colleen	Done	22	5/26/2015
But he was nervous! Sweat trickled down his leg and got on the beam, and when he took his next step, he closed his eyes and took the first bite. Mmmmmmmm! So good! Mmmmm. Mmmmmm gooood!!!! Exquisitely beautiful, on the very top, there balanced a gymnast who was trying out for the Olympics!
129	Climbing Enchanted Rock	betty	Done	21	5/2/2015
You have to be careful if you encounter one because You can't tell if it is going to bite you or try to hump you! Red clothes will set it off so, be sure to take the time to look around and enjoy the scenery.
128	I Need to Take a Trip !	betty	Done	22	4/16/2015
Good thing I was not looking directly at it, and a good thing I was wearing my asbestos underwear! It was so hot! It made me want to go to San Antonio, Texas to visit Bonnie, Chad, Xander, Ethan, and their dog named all the cats in the neighborhood: "Stinky", "Spazzy", "Sissy McWeepington", "Sir Pukesalot", etc.
127	Bonnie's New Tutoring Job	bonnie	Done	27	4/16/2015
I could use a pepper-upper! Maybe there is something in the staff refrigerator I could sample.... Sure enough...I opened the door and found a cup of Whoop-Ass! I immediately picked it up and threw it at him!
126	Getting Ready for New Year's Eve	betty	Done	22	2/18/2015
They were having a big sale and on the main shelves were stacks of old magazines that I had never read. Popular Science, Popular Mechanics, Family Handyman, as well as buckets of confetti, streamers, and plenty of loud outfits that we got from the thrift store.
125	New Year's Resolutions	bonnie	Done	22	12/24/2014
I exclaimed. "OK, now it's your best hope for improving your life. So what do you want? Do you want to take a trip to some exotic tropical island.
124	Get Those Presents Wrapped !	betty	Done	22	12/24/2014
Arrange them in a semi-circle under the Christmas tree, but make sure they are not near any pets. Now you are all set for a very Merry Christmas! Sit back, relax, and take a big sample of that egg nog !! I think we deserve it ! Regardless, I put it on the plate with the other desserts next to the Christmas tree.
123	We Need a Plumber !	betty	Done	22	12/12/2014
How did that get there? It has to be Vodka! Sweet lifeblood of our glorious mother country, it falls like water from the skies and collects in pools.
122	Christmas Decorations	bonnie	Done	22	12/12/2014
I put my car in first gear and turned onto the street and then what came toward me was a car with a Rudolph nose on the grill and antlers every where!
121	I Just Could Not Stop Playing That Video Game !!	betty	Done	21	11/28/2014
"That thing is enormous!" The doctor yelled. "We have to operate now!
120	The Great Beyond	xander	Done	21	9/21/2014
How did you get here? I bet you traveled on a expired visa! Bad boy! Whatcha gonna do when they come for you? I'm talking about the ICE, of course, and they don't have space suits safe enough to last over 6 months on Mars.
119	Summer	bonnie	Done	20	9/21/2014
Set up a giant lemonade stand right at the end of our driveway !! Not only would we sell lemonade, but we could also sell bags of ice. You know people really need those for seeing underwater.
118	Best Video Game of the Year !	betty	Done	22	8/15/2014
Last time we had an all-night video game marathon, the beer alone cost me all the money I made mowing lawns all summer! During those hot summer days I must have sweated 2 pints of O-positive.
117	The best movie EVER!!!	colleen	Done	21	7/18/2014
they were yelling. "Union forever!" I was appalled and could not watch a minute more; in fact, I just stood up and shouted, "
116	What I Saw When I Took A Walk II	greg	Done	23	5/28/2014
Put your hands behind your back stalked a ninja! He was there the ENTIRE TIME! When I realized that, I began to run as fast as I could to get home. sign. I had come too far and seen too much to stop now! So I kept going until I reached the end of of the road...and there was the sun setting in a gorgeous display of orange and gold !!
115	You know...	bonnie	Done	23	11/10/2013
Ted's day started out innocently enough, with his usual morning routine, but then, during his normally uneventful commute to work, a horde of zombies rushed toward his car! There must have been hundreds of them! They were everywhere!
114	Whatever is on your mind !	betty	Done	24	10/27/2013
But by the time you finish your last task, you have run out of time and lost all your money causing you to giggle with delight. You know it's the little things in life that really matter, so go ahead and get an associate's degree in plumbing. In will come in handy when you suddenly realize, "The whole time, I've been wondering which is better whole milk or 2%?
113	Nursery Rhyme	greg	Done	22	10/24/2013
HAHAHA!! There may be more to eat than even all the king's men can handle. We'll have to get the horses in on it too. They will no doubt go to the beach on the next sunny day and find oodles of candy to give to all the party guests!
112	Global Warming !	betty	Done	26	8/19/2013
The streets were teeming with people donning their cheddar hats, colby jack vests, and of course, their feta shoes. But suddenly, swarms of cheese-loving imps scrambled out of the manholes and began devouring the Twinkies from the overturned Hostess truck.
110	Planning a trip to Texas...or Virginia !	betty	Done	22	4/19/2013
Get organized! Go for gold! With a GQ (genetic quotient) this high, Jerome Morrow was never meant to be one step down on the podium. That's why he put all his underwear into zip-lock bags. Nobody wants strangers pawing through his underwear drawer.
109	Thanksgiving	bonnie	Done	19	12/19/2012
Your good china, your sparkling wine. We were just about to open our second bottle when suddenly, hot marshmallow started oozing out around the oven door! "How much for a deep fat fryer big enough for a turkey??
108	I Blew Up My Lab!	greg	Done	21	10/26/2012
Ooops! I forgot to put on the lid! All across the walls and floor were diplomas, certificates, degrees, and other accolades from a variety of prestigious institutes of learning and experimentation.
107	Christmas Shopping III	betty	Done	21	2/11/2012
Now he has great breath! (Muhahahaha) He also has another present hidden in the glove box of his car. Already in the glove box was a carefully wrapped gyro sandwich, hot and freshly made with lots of whipped cream and chopped up maraschino cherries and topped off with premium unleaded.
106	Let's Organize Your Garage !	betty	Done	22	7/25/2011
I had dozens of them, piled everywhere! They smelled like rotting potatoes. It was horrible. I tried to scoop them up with a long-handled metal scythe that we got from Reapers 'R' Us.
105	Christmas Shopping II	greg	Done	21	2/24/2011
When you see them coming you must floor it! "Eat my dust, turkeys!" I yelled out the window as the car shot out of the stocking which was hanging on the mantle.
103	Zombie Attack!	greg	Done	22	6/10/2010
That dern zombie took a chunk out of my arm and I can barely keep my eyelids open!
102	The Art of Decluttering	betty	Done	21	8/4/2009
The best teachers for this activity are female ! But that's OK! As a male, I know how to get things done.
101	The hathood of the traveling brown hat.	rhonda	Done	21	3/20/2009
That would look so cool on my hat. I got on the internet and ordered one from this company called "
100	The Nephews come to Visit	greg	Done	22	12/9/2008
I am so hungry I could eat a WHOLE pizza!" Xander exclaimed, " I am so hungry I could eat a WHOLE pizza!" When the nephews opened it, they found an enormous pile of puke the cats had upchucked!
99	Laser Eye Surgery	greg	Done	20	10/3/2008
Your insurance will not cover this! Just how do you intend to take out the eyeball and lay it on the cheek just long enough to read the eye chart perfectly. Better than perfect, in fact!"
98	Abiathar the Superhero!	greg	Done	21	4/27/2007
After dinner, he got to his feet and threw a zombie up in the air with his Jawbreaker, while at the same time he grabbed a troll by the ankle, spun him around and launched him into orbit with one flick of his manly wrist.
97	My New Video Game!	betty	Done	21	3/13/2007
Oh Boy! I got a new video game! I could hardly wait to get home to play it! I got home, opened the box, and inside I saw a giant strawberry! I could use it to make dessert with. I got my first 100 points with my first 100 kills. That was easy. Now for the next 500 points I would have to load up on missiles and ammo and armor before I woke up I had another dream about the battle!
96	Fixing up my Garden	greg	Done	22	1/29/2007
I've got half a mind to take a nap in the nearby hammock. Last summer I had installed the hammock between two pillars made of marble. They were 30 feet tall, 2 feet wide, and frankly they stink and I don't want them in my garden anymore.
95	Rearranging My New Tech Room	betty	Done	22	1/31/2007
No geek worth his salt would be caught dead without that telltale orange tint on his fingertips.
94	Speeding Down the Highway	betty	Done	21	12/4/2006
There's no place better than Montana to test the speed of your new car, but just getting there without a speeding ticket is the tricky part. Anyway I arrived and after mapping out my routes, I decided to stop at a truck stop and pick a fight. I was feeling all ornery, so as soon as I walked through the door I was frisked by a big burly policewoman.
93	Having Surgery	greg	Done	20	12/1/2006
Or sell one of his beamers. Or he could always try to throw up in the bedpan. Why don't the nurses ever come when you need them? Maybe it's because they accidentily stitched him up with tools still inside his abdominal cavity!
92	Accountant at Work	greg	Done	21	4/1/2006
They all laughed, and said you look like an alien! If you don't believe us, just go look in the mirror, and you will see why all accountants insist on only being paid with gold bullion.
91	What I Saw When I Took a Walk	betty	Done	21	3/31/2006
If I waited any longer I would poop on myself! So I turned around and I rushed toward the massive oak tree in order to hide behind it.
90	Learning a Foreign Language	greg	Done	22	2/4/2006
So we got cream pies in the face from those angry Frenchmen. Then we retaliated with a barrage of German invective. we snarled informally. Shocked, he picked his beret out of the muddy gutter, shook it off and put it on his resume. This will surely impress them!
89	Putting out Christmas Lights	betty	Done	21	2/3/2006
They were givin away a big pink inflatable heart for Valentine's Day, which was just around the corner, and there it was: a brand new Hobby Shop stocked with every kind of Christmas light you could imagine!
88	Lazor Beam Hydra	greg	Done	22	12/16/2005
"Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!" I laugh with raucous glee. You will be sorry; you will be very sorry when I stumbled upon a fully-loaded phaser rifle. It must have been dropped by an alphatrooper when he recovered from the blow to his head, he knew he would have to activate his quantum shields before it was too late!
87	Concert at Chrysler Hall	betty	Done	21	12/14/2005
I was thinking Goldman and Sachs. I asked, and they said please to take our seats immediately!
86	Touring Europe	bonnie	Done	21	12/13/2005
Where is the bathroom? Cuz I really gotta go." But to my surprise, he snapped the cork out of the bottle of champagne out poured it on my pancakes.
85	Christmas Shopping	betty	Done	22	12/1/2005
I ordered a quad shot espresso - only problem was by the time we got to the store, my hands were skipping over the keypad like a skilled pianist playing Chopin.
84	Working at McDonald's	greg	Done	21	12/1/2005
To which the manager, confused, replies, " Yo man, why you do me like dat? I'm the shizzle for my nizzle. And you know you're not allowed to eat mistakes!
83	Trip to the Pumpkin Patch	sherry	Done	22	11/7/2005
I had to squint to read the obiturary, but I managed to make out "squished by a giant pumpkin"!
82	test2	greg	Done	24	9/16/2015
Back to the basics of the hip-hop scene, just a loop, and some lyrics, and a mic, you know what I mean?
81	Going Into Space II	greg	Done	21	10/28/2005
One never knows what will happen if you transpose the warp stream with the antimatter containment field, you will surely lose your breakfast in a hurry, unless you made sure first that you fasten your helmet securely, fasten your oxygen hose, and secure you must be, and I the all-wise one, tell you I will, that you really had better know what you're doing by now!
80	Taking Computer Class	betty	Done	20	10/27/2005
NO! And if someone did, he would probably use DOS! Or Windows 3.1!! Ha ha ha!" We all had a big laugh. But the truth was hard to swallow; in fact I was so overwhelmed, that I had to make the computer do what the teacher wanted it to do!
79	Cooking Show II	greg	Done	21	9/27/2005
I exclaimed. "Truffles smell like sweaty gym socks. They also will alleviate constipation, especially for people who eat a lot of pasta!
78	Potty Training the Twins	betty	Done	21	9/24/2005
We used snow shovels most of the time, but sometimes we used cloth diapers when we ran out of all the clean air in the house was being gradually contaminated by the encroaching fog of green stench.
77	Noisy Neighbors	bonnie	Done	21	9/23/2005
They were running dune buggies up there! When they saw it, they finally understood.
76	Driving Across Country	betty	Done	22	9/16/2005
That reminded me of when we went camping and we pitched the tent on the side of a hill: When it rained we started sliding down the hill and we landed in a cow patty. Squish. We immediately had a flat tire!
75	NASCAR Days	greg	Done	21	9/9/2005
red, white, and blue streaks were all we could see of the cars! They were going so fast, the asphalt was melting. The pavement started to get sticky, and that made the tires start to melt. I panicked at first until I learned my suit was really fireproof.
74	Conserving Water	bonnie	Done	22	9/9/2005
You don't need to flush the toilet every time you use it. Flush it only when you go number two. Or if it's really raining, then you better run out with every bowl or bucket you have. It may be your only chance to go to the bathroom before we do our one and only daily flush.
73	The Best Diet Ever!	sherry	Done	21	8/31/2005
Everything else had failed...THIS was the one! and 250 lbs, could best be described as high fat, high sodium, and high sugar. Could this be a misprint?!! Just to be sure I put my glasses on and then I could see my feet!
72	What a Yard Sale!	betty	Done	20	8/23/2005
It feels SO GOOD to relax now and do my yoga exercises! I am so limber I bet I could put my foot under my bra. I didn't have a pocket so that's where I kept the money from the yardsale. Those chilly coins were a problem though, so we stunned them with electric shocks. After that they didn't need to mow the lawn!
71	Test Pilot	greg	Done	21	8/17/2005
He'd probably just freak out and start to open up the escape hatch. But that would cause the enemy to unleash the entirety of his airforce!! The noise of the numberless engines would shake the earth.
70	A Day in the Life of a Dork	sherry	Done	21	8/14/2005
Too bad some of them were warped from the heat in the attic. But I could always give them to my friend, ________ Raul. He'll know what to do. I hope we never run out of pencil sharpeners because if we do, we will have to hire a bodyguard!"
69	Time for a Checkup!	bonnie	Done	21	8/3/2005
"What??" I exclaimed. "Why would I need to order x-rays? Clearly the problem is an occluded colon.
68	Building My New Cat Condo	betty	Done	21	7/10/2005
That will act as ballast, and prevent the cat condo from collapsing onto the cats! What a mess that would be! And it would freak out the cats and cause them to fall. But I wouldn't worry too much because cats always are hungry. Like Confucious say, "Cat never full." That's why you have to have a wide base, or else a strong foundation, if you're going to make it that tall.
67	Putting Up Wallpaper	greg	Done	21	6/12/2005
This has to be done very carefully! If you don't do it correctly, you will have me to deal with!" With that, we all started booking the wallpaper so the glue would prep correctly.
66	My Newest Home Improvement Project!	betty	Done	20	5/17/2005
Well, I did, anyway. She thought that the circular saw would be perfect to slice the ham and salami for our lunch that day - can you believe that?" I almost lost it - not only were there woodchips in my sandwich, but now my favorite electric tool was perfect for sanding the hardwood floor prior to refinishing it.
65	Phone Call	bonnie	Done	21	5/9/2005
"Hop in and tell me where you want to go. I am your free taxi service today! But if you feel you must, you can just give me a chance! I'll be the best Space Marine you've ever seen, I promise! Now please repeat your name very slowly.
64	Airline Pilot	greg	Done	21	4/23/2005
I have to act quickly. I open the supply cabinet and what do I find? whoa, a flashback to me graduation party. I better get my head on straight because I have to be able to see out the cockpit window. Just give me a second. and see right before our eyes the ground rushing up toward us!
63	I'm Not In It For The...	bonnie	Done	21	4/6/2005
It's going to stay there until you get a good principal!" "We don't want a good principal!" "We want more crackerjacks! We want more juice. Fluff up our pillows! Don't you know who we are?
62	Hosting a Cooking Show	betty	Done	21	4/12/2005
"Close that window before that monkey gets in!" But it was too late, the hot cheese was dripping down onto the bottom of the oven and causing a terrible night with Nielsen's ratings. This was the lowest ranked show ever!
61	Ain't It Cool?	greg	Done	22	4/7/2005
It's like the heartbeat of the spirit, man. It's the soundtrack of life. You gotta have a belt with those pants if you don't want to be holding them up all day!
60	Competing with Starbuck's	bonnie	Done	21	4/2/2005
I wish they would go work at becoming more efficient at the cash register!" He, with furrowed brow, and she, petulant, continued to argue over which was the best sweetener. He liked good ol' cane sugar, while she preferred tea to coffee, it was good to try something new for a change, so she ordered a lemon cookie with her tea.
59	My First Ocean Cruise	betty	Done	21	3/28/2005
My first ocean cruise! I flew to Miami and boarded the beautiful liner with all the other baggage, getting stowed in the hold. The weather was balmy and perfect. It seemed a good time to take a walk around the deck and breathe in a lot of fresh fish!
58	Captain Underpants	greg	Done	21	3/23/2005
"Quick! To the Toiletmobile!" Captain Underpants and his sidekick Angel Soft jumped in the vehicle, and roared off to the water treatment plant! Unfortunately, once they got there, they discovered that Colonel Colon had eaten ALL the Grape-Nuts!
57	New Year's Resolutions!	bonnie	Done	21	3/18/2005
The first thing I want to tackle in the New Year is DEEEEEE-cluttering! That's right, this is the perfect time to go on a diet and find a new recipe for low fat, low cholesterol, high protein baked bars of coconut, nuts, chocolate and condensed milk.
56	Saturday Morning's Cartoon Marathon	betty	Done	21	3/13/2005
T to a knock-down, drag-out fight to the finish. There was utter pandemonium until Mr.
55	Spy Base Alpha	greg	Done	21	3/8/2005
Over here, we don't need money; we trade and barter for everything. It is a liberating feeling: not having to carry a wallet.
54	Texas Winter	bonnie	Done	20	3/3/2005
The pool isn't big enough ! and she pointed at a picture of the "Beef Stampede." We gasped; no one had ever managed to eat much at any of my Christmas parties; they mostly just wanted iced tea. It was just too hot.
53	Christmas Shopping - 2004	betty	Done	20	2/26/2005
Hundreds of kids having a present wrapping contest. Paper, ribbons, tape were flying everywhere. It was pandemonium. We knew we had to max out our credit cards immediately. That would not be too hard, since I'd already decided what to get for everyone.
52	Modeling Agency	greg	Done	21	2/21/2005
Soon their faces matched their chartreuse skin with their pointy ears and antennae. She never imagined Andorrans would be here! Totally confused, Jacqueline exclaimed "Fairy wings!"
51	All I Need Is...	bonnie	Done	21	2/16/2005
That's such a relaxing and beautiful big pouffy couch. Come and sit on it, and you will feel the stress leave your body quickly. might I recommend a jackhammer operator? Your first day will probably be the least fun because you will have to get all your shots and make sure your coffee maker is off when you leave the house.
50	My Summer at the Archeological Dig	betty	Done	21	2/11/2005
And yet, here are the little yellow wrappers!" There was a long, tense silence, until finally someone said, "Well, I'm hungry.
49	Shopping at Lowe's	greg	Done	20	2/6/2005
Actually, you may need TWO carts! In fact, you may find that the selection of 2x4s has way too many knots in it. In which case, you should start over. As much of a headache that is, it'll be even worse if you led mold take control.
48	Anorexia Therapy	bonnie	Done	21	2/1/2005
Just throw out all your mirrors, and get those Amusement Park ones that make you look fatter than you really are. Then you'll look normal! It's O.K. Just throw out all your mirrors, and get those Amusement Park ones that make you look fatter than you really are.
47	Building My New House!	betty	Done	23	1/27/2005
As for a hard, scratch-resistant cutting surface, I chose muraled tempered glass. It was beautiful! Shining through from underneath were rows and rows of seats for the home theater. We could present movies in professional comfort for up to 30 people.
46	Ultimate Ninja II	greg	Done	21	1/22/2005
Then I jumped over the wall and into the swirling vortex of fear! Countering the attack with another new move, the hovering spinning high kick, he propelled his opponent across the room flew a whirling bat ninja right at me.
45	Election Day!	betty	Done	21	1/17/2005
Meanwhile, across the street, the DNC rally was handing out free copies of the Communist Manifesto, which were all autographed by Snoop Doggy Dog and Jesse Jackson.
44	A Day in the Life of...	bonnie	Done	20	1/12/2005
Feathers were flying everywhere. Tiny blood spatters covered his face with his hands, as he heard the prison warden approaching. A heartless, cruel man, the warden was well-known for his ferocity in battle. Remarkably unscathed for having been in so many wars, there were few scars.
43	High School Carwash	greg	Done	20	1/7/2005
We took it and squeezed it as hard as we could. Then we took both ends and twisted them into mangled balls of metal.
42	Pushed Over the Edge	bonnie	Done	21	1/2/2005
Disgusted and demoralized, I bent to clean it up. The broken nose was so out of joint that breathing was difficult. Something had to be done! The doctor quickly cleaned the nostrils and inserted a peanut-butter sandwich into the VCR. Then he stuck a fork in an electrical outlet.
41	Cleaning Out the Garage	betty	Done	21	12/28/2004
We then looked at the workbench ; there lay Barrister really liking all the room where he could stretch out, and also he enjoyed the warm sunlight as he stepped out into the fresh air for a little break.
40	HULK SMASH!	greg	Done	20	12/23/2004
We even tried to quiet our breathing, fast and loud from our sprint. We pressed our backs against the wall, trying to hide in the shadow of the titanic Doom-Bot, which Dr. Nefarious had unleashed upon the unsuspecting city. Little did he know, right around the corner there was Emil Blonsky, better known as the Abomination!
39	Joining the PTA	bonnie	Done	20	12/18/2004
We didn't know quite what to do. So we blindly decided to strike chocolate-iced doughnuts from the cafeteria breakfast menu.
38	Going to the County Fair	betty	Done	20	12/13/2004
I looked down and could feel my breakfast coming up. I quickly leaned over and threw up, deftly avoiding potentially lethal food poisoning. Then I grabbed a ticket to go see the biggest cow on the planet.
37	News at 11	greg	Done	20	12/8/2004
It was going to be a very big news day! Hurricane Bonnie had wiped out all of the office staff. Without meeting the deadlines on the paperwork, dozens of suspects would go free! Frantically, the police captain called a temp agency. They worked around the clock sweeping all the flood waters out of the newsroom.
36	Investigating Vegetarianism	bonnie	Done	21	12/3/2004
I'd heard about people who were vegetarians, and the various flavors thereof, and was interested to find out more so whenever I became acquainted with one, I would ask for a cheeseburger, hold the meat!
35	Boppy's Trip to Texas	betty	Done	21	11/28/2004
It's even good for fryin' up that armadillo you done run right over with your dang ol' truck. We scraped it up off the road, and put it in a tortilla! Everything tastes good in a tortilla! Meat, eggs, cheese, even chopped veggies mixed with ranch dressing, peanut butter, honey, butter, and more peanut butter.
34	Dance Class	bonnie	Done	21	11/23/2004
Ready to dance? First lift your right leg and touch your toes on the edge of the piano. We were lucky enough to have live piano music to dance to. Which makes sense, actually, because the piano player had sprained his ankle and couldn't show up.
33	The Minotaur King	greg	Done	21	11/18/2004
It also helps prevent muscle soreness. To remedy that Ben-Gay is good. Otherwise you can also rub on some invisibility potion. Then we could more safely find our way there. So many dangers beset us, we scarcely conceived of ever making it through the maze alive.
32	The Bizarre Bazaar	bonnie	Done	20	11/13/2004
The merchant told me this was the last day he would be open. Before I could say another word, the air shimmered around us and a transdimensional vortex appeared in mid-air, sucking the entire bazaar into oblivion before my very eyes!
31	My Trip Around the World	betty	Done	21	11/8/2004
Where are we going? To be, or not to be, that is the question." Clearly we had to go to London, to celebrate Shakespeare and see the Great Wall of China.
30	Downtown Precinct	greg	Done	22	11/3/2004
I'm nervous about this, you know. The fact that I'm addicted to placebos doesn't make it any easier. I'd give them up, but it wouldn't make any difference. I guess I'm as ready as I'll ever be. Put the handcuffs on and lead me away.
29	Growing Up on a Farm	betty	Done	21	10/29/2004
Granddaddy would put his fingers in his ears because he did not want to hear the gunshot. Then everyone would join in to cut up the lard and use it to fry the bacon, sausage, eggs, toast, and soup.
28	The Dinosaur World	bonnie	Done	21	10/24/2004
I'm so sweaty." Everyone agreed and started looking around. "Look at all these fossilized bones. I wonder how old they really are. Would they be as old as me?" She shook her head, and replied "I imagine these dinosaurs are at least 100 years old.
27	Gardening with Betty	greg	Done	20	10/19/2004
Let me demonstrate. (Blam! Blam! Blam!) Oops, that was Roger and June's night light!
26	On the Open Road	bonnie	Done	21	10/14/2004
I thought of the title because it reminds me of a song. This story will be about a motorcycle trip. I started tuning up my bike, changing the oil, checking the tire pressure, checking the engine timing, and finally I was ready to check the air pressure in the tires.
25	The International Village	bonnie	Done	21	10/9/2004
You need to figure out the answer yourself; so go to the library, and look for a book about Sun Tzu, author of The Art of War. He'll know what to do." We rampaged through the tattered remains of library for an hour, and finally found her yak!
24	Weekend in Paris	greg	Done	21	10/4/2004
You flamin' liberal French sissy. Go back into your cave and drink your cafe au lait. Next time I see you I will give you $20, but only if you can seat us in a better part of the restaurant.
23	Xander Goes Shopping	betty	Done	22	9/29/2004
You know, I am getting hungry. Is there a restaurant around here anywhere?" And sure enough there was a Taco Bell right inside the store! So Xander hurried over there and ordered a big Mac with cheese and extra ketchup and Great Biggie Fries.
22	Fart Dictionary	bonnie	Done	21	9/24/2004
It's like a stink bomb dropping in a room. One can only hope that one is alone if this happens. If others are present, your only hope is to fart again, only this time fart harder, and hopefully it'll be toxic enough to kill any witnesses.
21	Boot Camp	greg	Done	21	9/19/2004
Let them worry about it! Rabies? Let them worry about it! He started foaming at the mouth and just could not resist biting the tar out of every single drill sargeant on the base.
20	Good Old Pop's Drive-in	betty	Done	21	9/14/2004
There was something dark and sinister about him. He was an overweight, hairy man, and as of yet, I hadn't heard him say a word. Around him, we always felt painfully nervous and always anticipating the worst. Nevertheless, we tried to be friendly and we gave him a fruit basket as a welcome gift, hoping to stay on his good side!
19	Going Back to College	betty	Done	21	9/9/2004
she said, laughing. "Go down that hall and take the third right, the take a quick left, to down the stairs, go through the double doors then down the hall, take the first right, the second left, up the single flight of steps, and then you will be in jail!
18	If You Give a Mouse a Cookie	bonnie	Done	21	9/4/2004
And if you let him wash the dishes, he may notice the soap bubbles drifting in the air, and that will remind him of days long gone by when he used to sit under the willow tree lanquidly blowing bubbles and drinking his tall cold glass of lemonade, and he would daydream about floating on his back in the swimming pool, feeling the warm sunshine and cool water, relaxing while listening to the sonic booms from the numberless jets flying overhead.
17	Our Summer Vacation	betty	Done	21	8/30/2004
I asked. "That was quite a steep waterslide! I don't think I want to go down that again! It scared me too much and when I got to the bottom, I hit a Honda Civic!
16	Trapped in a Mine	greg	Done	21	8/25/2004
In case it rains. And that's ALL I NEED! And this chair. And that's ALL I NEED. And this dead battery. And this rock. And this lawn chair. And that's ALL I NEED!" People began to stare at him because he had a pale green luminescence about him.
14	Our Visit to the Library	bonnie	Done	21	8/15/2004
"Just kidding!" I yelled. "It's just a joke!" But it didn't matter. Everyone brought their posters for the big Super Readout Day. And they set up a display on the lawn outside the library. But the weather report was not so good, so when they looked up into the sky they saw not only the police helicopters arriving in the distance as reinforcements, but also the vultures had already started circling.
13	Stress Reduction Techniques	bonnie	Done	23	8/10/2004
Would you please go twiddle your thumbs while I take care of MY important business! You are so getting on my nerves! I think you should focus on your breathing. That is an excellent way to direct energy.
12	My New Job at Burger King	betty	Done	20	8/5/2004
Do you think anyone would be able to get all those wads of gum from underneath the tables? They must have accumulated for years! Here, take this old spatula and whack the back of the head of any customers who don't agree to 'super-size' their combos."
11	Cooking with Grandma	betty	Done	22	7/31/2004
Boy, were they needing some more M&M's on top. And melted marshmallows. And chocolate sprinkles on top of that. "Hey," Betty called from inside, "Are those hot dogs ready yet?" I said, "Hot dogs? I thought we we were having T-bone steaks! What a bummer.
10	Ultimate Ninja	greg	Done	22	7/26/2004
Well he would just have to use his fisticuff expertise. He stood his ground and watched the arch enemy spin and shrivel, whirling ever faster, ever smaller, energy bursts zinging out into the air until all the life force and all the mass had moved to the back of his neck.
8	Wall Street Blues	greg	Done	22	7/16/2004
It was a hollow sound. But it was the only one he cared about anymore. His laughter, tinged with madness, echoed through the prison daily.
7	Going into Space	betty	Done	21	7/11/2004
Or these little wafers, made out of Soylent Green are so tasty, that the spaceship crew wanted to eat a whole galaxy.
5	Ye Olde Medieval Days	betty	Done	21	7/1/2004
He strode in purposely, a roast beef hoagie in one hand, and a salami grinder in the other.
4	Barrister the Lawyer Cat	betty	Done	21	6/26/2004
But Barrister denied that his client had done any real wrong. The prosecutor, Miss Na Tasha scrambled up fuming. She dove at Barrister with claws extended. The fur did fly. even tried to intervene, but he was stomped on by Godzilla.
3	The Big Conundrum	betty	Done	21	6/21/2004
Invigored with his courage, again he shouted, " and pounded his shoe on the table for effect. Unfortunately, the force of it caused an explosion of monumental proportions! Everyone stood in fearful amazement wondering if they would be doomed to live the rest of their lives up in branches of this oak tree.
2	Woo baby!	greg	Done	21	6/16/2004
"You deep-fried carrots sticks???" Bonnie nodded gleefully, and handed her a big basket of individually wrapped rolls of toilet paper. A bonus to be sure!
1	Big Computer	greg	Done	18	6/11/2004
How he remembered when he had broken his wrist playing badmitton with an orc. Apparently the orc thought it would be pretty darn funny to replace the shuttlecock with a BRAND NEW CAR! THAT'S RIGHT! once he heard that, he knew the time was near. So near, in fact, he nervously checked his ticket stub to make sure he wasn't late for the previews.