| Most people who encounter the brown hat will never be affected by the hat's presence. However, for the select few who are touched by the brown hat, their lives will never be the same. Our story begins on a windy and cool, but bright, February day. This story is about a brown hat. Not just any brown hat, mind you, but specifically it was really a purple hat that was needed. So we walked to the Beatific Bonnet Boutique, looked in the window, and saw just what we wanted: a winning lottery ticket! Right there in the parking lot! Now we could afford to add several egret feathers and even a boa to the brim of the traveling brown hat. But to attach them, we needed to use our most skulky ninja tactics in order to get the brown hat to its next destination. We surrepticiously crossed the street and found a a secret cave lined with dozens of bats and hundreds of poopy tax return pages. "Hmm, he must have run out of TP and used this instead." But this wouldn't help me find the hat. What I needed was a big eagle's feather! That would look so cool on my hat. I got on the internet and ordered one from this company called "The Joke's on You, LLC." They specialize in sneaky stuff like letting the air out of the sweatband of the hat where I found a secret note! The note said, "Help me! I'm trapped in a fortune cookie factory!" It was then we realized our next stop had to be a chinese restaurant. And it was a good thing, too... because big drops of sweat were pouring down my face. It was just so hot that I had to grab the hat and hurl it into a guy's open car window as I shot past him on the interstate. Utterly freaked out, he slammed on the brakes just in time to avoid hitting the big brown and white brownie sundae with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles. Thus distracted, I took the hat and stomped on it. It needed to look a little battered for the play I was going to be in. Believe it or not , I was going to act the part of the fool! That way they would never suspect that the next place I put the hat would be like crushing prunes into stewed okra. Things would really move along then! Why you might not even have time to check under the car, behind the seats, and in the glovebox. Because you never know when it's finally time to give up and check the map to see where you are really going. THE END! |