| My eyes glazed over as I stared at the customer... at least, he *would* be a customer if he ever made up his mind and ordered something. I tried not to smirk when the customer called me "Luv". I knew she was from Guinea, especially when she proceeded to order a Whopper...oops, this is McDonald's!!! Just a small faux pas, she thought. Well, think again!! The employee's eyes bugged out and he screamed "I want a refill! NOW!!!" But he didn't understand that we never clean off the tables unless the manager yells at us; which he usually does every hour: He yells, "Orrrder uuuuuup!" To which the manager, confused, replies, "Yo man, why you do me like dat? I'm the shizzle for my nizzle. And you know you're not allowed to eat mistakes! Put that in the waste bucket!" Reluctantly, I placed the tomato heels and limp lettuce on each one of the cash registers. I tried to hit the button to open the drawer, but it really didn't matter if a few pickles fell on the floor. We could always rinse them off and use them on the next drive-through customer, who had just ordered 2 large cokes, 2 large fries, and 2 giant Cokes with crushed garlic. That ought to kick it up a notch! BAM! He slapped a $500 dollar bill on the counter. "Those are out of circulation!" Bill exclaimed. "Doesn't matter." the customer replied smugly. "It's legal tender. See? It says right here: "This product may contain peanuts and for those persons with allergies, it may cause severe difficulty in operating a vehicle or other heavy equipment!" I considered this innovation. It would seem that fast-food production was more streamlined and technology-driven than even Dilbert could ever imagine! The new kitchen at Mc Donald's could satisfy even a barnyard full of swine. That's why we never eat at McDonald's anymore! THE END! |